In a little more than 5 weeks I will be traipsing around Europe with my little family. Did I fail to mention this to you somehow? I'm going to blame it all on the drugs - or lack thereof.
Yes, we are taking THE trip we have been waiting on for 14 years. Yes, we are taking M. Yes, she is nearing the "SPOILED" column of children you know. Yes, it will be the chance of a lifetime. Yes, it will cost us an arm, a leg and probably my liver & one of my kidneys. They're welcomed to them all, because SO HELP ME! I am going on this trip.
What fills me with dread is not the lack of air-conditioning, the price of the Euro or explaining nude statues to M. It is carrying around about 100 extra pounds on planes, trains and sometimes automobiles. It is the thought of the American Disabilities Act being completely useless in Europe! They don't have escalators, elevators around every corner over there. They actually expect me to huff and puff my way around their incredibly old buildings. Which I'm fine with if I didn't have to be lugging those extra 100 pounds.
Of course, I'm trying to travel as light as possible. But it's three weeks, people. It's not some weekend trip to the Outer Banks or Carmel. So! I figure if I can keep my suitcase to about 30 pounds (I need my shoes, we'll be doing a lot of walking) I should do fine.
100 - 30 = cabbage soup.
The extra poundage comes from, of course, me. I am carrying around about 80 extra pounds on my tiny frame. Hmmm....Using the words "me" and "tiny" in the same sentence almost makes me break into laughter. I learned from my new doctor that the medicine I just gave up during rehab is notorious for massive weight gain. Fabulous. Just what I needed. More ways to put on pounds. So I have 39 days to try the cabbage soup-Acai Berry-Weight Watchers-Atkins-South Beach-Jenny Craig-NutriSystem-Slim Fast-Salami-High Fat, Low Carb-Sugar Free-Taste Free-Lose your mind diet to lose 70-80 pounds before I try to board the plane and they make me buy an extra ticket because my fat is spilling over into my husband's space. Do you think they'll charge me less because it won't use a pillow or need a soda?
I'm thinking this plan is doable. Don't you?
If anyone can do it...it'd be you :)
ReplyDeleteAnd just think...what ever you don't lose pre-trip you will almost certainly lose post-trip with all those stairs and walking.
Now just stay away from those yummy European bakeries.
I'll do it with you. Serious. I have a 4 week deadline too.
ReplyDeleteLet's see what we can do . . .
Another GREAT post!
ReplyDelete(It'd be fun to watch you shrink into your frame! ;)
And I'm sooooo jealous your trip to Europe. Yes M is a lucky duck!
Oh!!!!! I just realized I used your name below . . . delete it quick if you must.
I am sooooo excited for you. We have a trip planned in a few years. You'll have to pass on any pointers you discover. Have a blast!
ReplyDeleteSister- i just had to create an account to be able to leave you a comment!!! Anyways- i know you can do it!! I too am overweight... i am ten pounds over my max weight for the army and im apparently on the verge of being obese!! Im so close to just saying the heck with it and enjoying all of the yummy treats life has to offer! Pass some of your determination and motivation this way sister!
ReplyDeleteYou can do it girl. Ever since I have known you in Littleton you have been one to admire who has accomplished all she sets out to do. Have a gret time in Europe. Miss ya.
ReplyDeleteYou guys are going to have a wonderful time...I'm a little bit jealous too :) Let me know when you want to talk about your camera.
ReplyDelete